hung out with one of my best buddies in the whole world yesterday. it was so nourishing.

to love and to be loved
to know and to be known
to sparkle and to be seen
to glow and to be hugged...

that was yesterday
i love you jenna x

book

finished memory keeper's daughter. (the fiction beat the non-fiction :). the book is about a doctor who secretly gives away his down syndrome daughter at birth and tells his wife she died. the nurse, who was in love with the doctor, can't bring herself to leave the little girl at the scary, gray institution and decides to keep her as her own. the nurse has to constantly fight for her 'daughter' to get a decent education and medical care. there is one scene which will never leave me where she takes her daughter into hospital after being stung by a bee (the girl's allergic) and she is essentially asked if she would just rather let nature take is course and let her daughter die than give her treatment (my blood boiled). gave me some good insights into a not so pleasant attitude from the 60's and 70's towards the mentally 'retarded'. helped me understand the little glimpses i see of this disappearing world view.

sleepy

Tired, her eyelids sway up and down like tiny tides. The magpies carol. Open. Mummy breathes. Close. A dog barks. Open. She rolls over. Close. The fan swirls. Open. Snuggle into mummy. Close. She drinks deeply. I'm not sure where I finish and she begins. Her hands glide like star fish on my skin. Silky skin on skin. And finally the caroling magpies, the distant barking dog and the swirling fan move into one lullaby and Danika falls asleep.

currently reading...

irresistible revolution by shane claireborne and the memory keeper's daughter by kim edwards. both brilliant (so far, only half way through).

i have decided to read more fiction. i love reading because it keeps my brain active and makes me feel smart (compared to TV which makes me feel dumb) but reading to much non-fiction gives me all these logical arguments and prepositions which reinforce what i already believe (even when i disagree with the author, i still become more clear of my argument) and i'm not sure i want to be all that certain of my logical arguments and prepositions.

good novels give me a sense of awe, mystery, empathy and compassion. these things are more important to me than clarity of mind.

hospital visit

danika just had her first visit to hospital...because her daddy sliced his finger on the lawn mower and needed stitches. she didn't like it much. neither did daddy.

i have three homes;

my body
my house
my planet

danika stumbled her first few steps tonight. she thinks she's the cleverest thing in the whole world.

Grandad's memorial today. sad. healthy sad. there was a photo of Grandad and Grandma cutting their wedding cake. Grandma's wedding dress was made out off fabric from 'coupons' and a lace curtain. she looked beautiful. she is beautiful. she started life as an orphan and ends it as a widow.