in a strange and lonely world tonight. the rug is being ripped out from under me. my eyes are wide searching for a focus. i have 3 days left with my school kiddies, and then the persona of 'Mrs Ellery' loses all practical meaning. i've had 7 injections in 8 days... who knows what strange creatures swim through my blood. perhaps it's them that give me butterflies at the thought of cleaning the house, perhaps it's them that knots up my back in moments of peace, perhaps it's them that spin my thoughts through out the night and send charges of unnecessary adrenaline through my body. each day holds the emotions of a month.

Dear Lord,

I hold onto you - you are my only hope.

You are the order of the Earth

The logic of the seasons.

The rhythm of night and day.

The mathematics of my breath.